Miss Tabitha’s Phone Sex and Nuclear Apocalypse Preparation Hotline

Via PointInCase

This is a fun and silly short story by Sarah Hawley that came across our feeds. We wanted to share an excerpt:

Hello?

Hi, Randy. Ooh, you sound sexy. My name is Tabitha, and I’m here to fulfill all your erotic fantasies while making sure you’re prepared for a nuclear strike.

Where are you? In your backyard?

 If you have running water, wash that delicious body with lots of soap. If not, do whatever you can to wipe away any radioactive particulates.

I’m lying in bed right now, thinking about you and touching myself. Suddenly, there’s an enormous flash, bright enough to blind you if you look right at it. Then you see a mushroom cloud billowing in the distance. I want you to get inside, Randy. Go as far underground as you can or into the center of a building. Close all the doors and windows.

If you have running water, wash that delicious body with lots of soap. If not, do whatever you can to wipe away any radioactive particulates. 

Good, Randy. Now tell me… what are you wearing right now?

 

If you like this story, read the rest on PointsInCase.

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