10 Gift Ideas for the Freaky Geek in Your Life

The holidays are quickly approaching, which means ’tis the season of giving. If you are a little uncertain about what to get the difficult to shop for weird kids in your life, we’ve put together this list to help. (If you don’t find something you like here, don’t worry – we’re doing it again next week!)

The Haunted Vagina by Carlton Melton III

A book concept so ridiculous they can’t help but love it. Available through Amazon, because of course it is. ($7.95 for Paperback, $4.95 for Kindle)

“It’s difficult to love a woman whose vagina is a gateway to the world of the dead…

Steve is madly in love with his eccentric girlfriend, Stacy. Unfortunately, their sex life has been suffering as of late, because Steve is worried about the odd noises that have been coming from Stacy’s pubic region. She says that her vagina is haunted. She doesn’t think it’s that big of a deal. Steve, on the other hand, completely disagrees. 

When a living corpse climbs out of her during an awkward night of sex, Stacy learns that her vagina is actually a doorway to another world. She persuades Steve to climb inside of her to explore this strange new place. But once inside, Steve finds it difficult to return… especially once he meets an oddly attractive woman named Fig, who lives within the lonely haunted world between Stacy’s legs.”

A Lovecraftian Cthulhu Dice Bag 

Whether you use it to play Call of Cthulhu, or you just want to bring some Lovecraftian horror to your D&D table, this Cthulhu themed dice bag is the perfect accessory. There are a lot of sellers who offer similar dice bags on Etsy, as well as Beholder bags (if that is more your speed of monster). This one is from Etsy seller MyFunkyCamelot for $40.

“Cthulhu Ed is a very soft fuzzy adorably evil drawstring pouch. Great for use as a Dungeons and Dragons Dice bag, for a handful of miniatures and dice, for card game storage, magic the gathering cards, for your cel phone and electronic gadgets, or as the most awesome wristlet purse at the SciFi Con!”

Mimic Monster Box

If you’d rather store your dice in a Mimic, don’t worry – there are plenty of options on Etsy for that too. This one is from Etsy user BTSBEASTYCREATIONS and runs for $75.

“This one-of-a-kind hand made dice box sits is painted with acrylics. Sealed for protection and longevity! Holds multiple sets of dice.”

Curvy Beetlejuice Lamp

Etsy seller Omulamp has all kinds of kitschy designs, but we are partial to the classic Beetlejuice style (she also offers Freddy Krueger, Hellraiser and additional Beetlejuice styles). This particular style sells for $158.89

“Single lamp made and hand painted paper (streamers) on wood base.
The lamp is made to order as close as possible to the model, about the same.

Inspired by Beetlejuice and aesthetics of Tim Burton.
Two lamp screen models available (the clear black and black opaque).

Filled with resin and foam make it very light and strong.”

Faux Taxidermy Tentacle

It’s no secret that we love tentacles at Geeky Freaky. This one created by Etsy seller ArtAkimbo looks super realistic, down to the resin water splashes. We are sure that this will make an unexpected but appreciated gift – it’s a conversation starter, and affordable at $130 (although there are larger sizes offered as well).

“This super-swell octopus tentacle sculpture features a transparent aqua splash and a rusted porthole.

Invite this critter into your home and observe how it wriggles its way through your wall and into your heart. 

I cast these octopus arms out of urethane resin in molds that I make from my original sculptures. They are polished and colored with dyes and paint. The porthole is coated with iron and rusted, then sealed to keep the rust tidy.”

Pink Baphomet Wall Art

If the giftee in your life loves worshiping Satan but their altar is full of glitter and sparkles, why not give them this hot pink Baphomet wall sculpture by Etsy user ChrisandResCreations. Chris has faux taxidermy and bizarre sculptures across a variety of occult and mythological themes, but we just couldn’t resist posting the pink Baphomet – it can be yours (to gift, of course) for $175.

“This faux taxidermy Baphomet head mount is all hand made and original. 

This is a made to order piece and will not be created until an order has been placed.

It’s face , ears , and torch are all hand sculpted using polymer clay. Baphomet is hand painted using mostly acrylic paints. The pelt is a faux fur.”

Audrey II Hair Piece

For the more subtle of freaky geeks, how about this fashionable Audrey II hair piece? It has a fun tiki vibe and is a great way to fancy up an outfit. Sold by Etsy user FancyFruits, it’s also offered in other colors as well as in statue form. This one sells for $40

“Get ready for Tiki Oasis, Monsterpalooza, Viva Las Vegas, Halloween, Monster Island or just grocery shopping at Ralph’s, seriously, where wouldn’t you wear this? 

This is the carnivorous alien flower clip you’ve always wanted!! (Does not sing or drink blood btw)”

Harajuku Decoden 3D Nails

For someone a little, ah, flashier, how about these truly outrageous Japanese inspired decoden nails? Etsy seller LhouraiisShop offers a variety of styles (including some darker ones) but these are her most elaborate (and expensive) at $55.99

“Princess/Queen HimeGyaru nails! Very extreme! The base to each nail is glittery (not that you can see it, under all the bling!) One nail on each hand are gold glitter!”

Oogie Boogie Coat Rack

We love the funky combination of bold colors and fun shapes in the Nightmare Before Christmas clothing rack. Etsy user RaxFox creates tons of whimsical furniture designs inspired by Tim Burton, Alice in Wonderland and Doctor Suess, with unnatural shapes and bright colors. This is one of the more affordable pieces at only $67.74

“These coat racks can easily be attached to a wall via 2 screws. They are handmade of hard birch plywood, are around 55cm(21″) long and the hooks are made of resin by ourselves and painted by our hands.”

Light Up Cyberpunk Glasses

While these aren’t super practical (unless that Terminator style HUD really works), they are totally fashionable. For the club kid, cyberpunk hacker, or raver in your life, how about a pair of these glasses from Etsy user illumicyberware? There are several different colors and designs available at $55.

“Laser cut and hand formed with padded earpieces for comfort and ultra bright green leds, the photos don’t really do them justice.

These glow brilliantly when powered up.

Absolutely unique and guaranteed to get you noticed in the club, these things are BRIGHT!”



That’s it for this list, but check back in a week for more suggestions!

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